Wednesday, January 25, 2012

start of 2012

it was very happy to start it with the beloved one,
I felt so full inside my heart with all his appearance through this year,
but sadly, 
he felt sick on the last day of 2011 and can't having much activities for the new year count down,
but still, 
we had a great time in home and watch live streaming for the Taiwan count down concert,
not bad thou! :)

after that back to campus again to prepared for the exam weeks,
study all the way but felt like came to third year nothing to fear about,
it just about exams that we went through every time,
we studied for so many times and this is almost the last few times big examinations in our life,
that comes nothing to fear on it,
but still need to study larrrrrr.....

on the second week,
I knew something about my grandma,
but I thought it just a normal hospital visiting,
it was the last time sending her to hospital and she just pass away on the next day.
in our Chinese superstitious, 
we believe that when a person with all the illness and not affordable to wake up and just lye on bed suddenly woke up and talk and laugh with her children all,
my father realize something but never said it out,
believe that nobody wanted to listen to that,
but still on the next day everyone having a tired night and heading back to own home,
hundred miles away from Pahang.

when reach each home,
we got the called from my mom,
she was the last person staying back to accompany her mom,
she called everyone of us,
I felt very weird cause she seldom called us especially on day time,
she told us calmly that grandma pass away!
that time I was just finished the second paper and ready for the third paper on the next day,
I was too shock to know this news,
no people expect it.
my mom just asked me want to fly back there or not,
my first mind answered " I having exam now, still got paper, see how then "
on the next second,
I quickly called my dad and ask how,
he said if I managed to fly back but nobody can fetch me to Pahang there,
and then I straight called my boy and ask his opinion,
when he OK with it,
I straight book flight tickets and back on the next 2 days.

when I received the called, 
I knew my mom already too sad to show her sadness,
but she still talked normally to us,
but I was too shock on this and tears coming down all the ways,
I can't stop it for about 15 minutes like that,
many memories came back from young times until recently.

it had been 2 years time didn't met her already,
I still thought this year having a long holiday  for Chinese New Year and pay them a visit,
who knows,
it's always too late on it,
no more chances to meet her,
even they all met her before last Christmas because of she went to KL had a body check up,
they had a big dinner together over there,
my whole family get to meet her except me,
I was too far away for it,
my faith,
luckily I still managed to back there and sent her for the last journey over there.

everyone seems normal but still on the last day cannot control on the feeling and cried,
after that we all sent her to Selangor there for cremation,
we all were too tired for that few days,
but after all,
I really need to say a big thank you to my boy,
no him,
I really can't go back there and visit her for the last time,
really thanks a lot to him. *thanks babe*

1 week later,
Chinese New Year is coming,
finished exam and back to hometown on the next day,
met my boy before I get back to hometown on the next day,
we shopped for many hours to get a suitable clothes for CNY until the last minute I heading back home.

this year CNY really past too fast,
every relative just stay here for 2 days only and get back to own home,
too quiet this year,
when back to mom's hometown,
we also just stay for 1 night only,
had a dinner and pray for our grandma,
back home again on the next day.

until today,
because of less sleeping time,
I fell sick,
too bad !

I drove all along from my home to Pahang yesterday for the first time,
proud on me!
I just took a normal timing like my father,
not too slow thou.

but really having many hours in car really make us felt tired all the times!

p/s: I still left half year more to finish my study, let's fight for it until the end of it and get a new and tough life on the "miserable" world after that, there are many things that waiting for us to get rid on it. :)